More News from Down Under

Let’s keep the Australia theme alive with a little discussion of Mel Gibson, shall we? What a crazy fuck. Here’s a quick rundown of his preferred targets:

Jews
We first learned about Mel’s aversion to Jews upon the release of the Passion of the Christ, which didn’t exactly put a positive spin on the Chosen People. Cut to a few years later, and we find a soused Mel fingering the Jews as the root of all evil. He tried to excuse his behavior through the strategic use of the old dipsomaniac gambit (“I was drunk and didn’t mean what I said”) but the billions of people who’ve been drunk and managed to refrain from denigrating an entire race didn’t buy it.

Blacks
Mel seemed so friendly with Danny Glover in those halcyon Lethal Weapon days, but he must have just been a better actor than we thought. As we all now know, he was recently caught on tape likening black men to pack animals and implying that they’re roving rapists, albeit in language richer than mine. Oddly, despite the appalling and overt racism in this career-ending comment, black people were actually little more than an ancillary target. In making this statement, the real butt of his rage was…

Women
Yes, women. Although Mel’s insinuation that black men are animalistic sex offenders is admittedly strong enough to stand on its own, the real kicker is his follow-up assertion that his ex and the mother of one of his children in fact deserves to be a victim of the imaginary “pack of [rapist] n*****s.” In another choice threat, Gibson reportedly told his ex, "I am going to come and burn the fucking house down...but you will blow me first." Oh, and she also claims that he knocked out her two front teeth while she held their infant in her arms. Lovely.

Hispanics
His use of the word “wetback” in order to refer to his nanny seems to have been little more than an afterthought.

Mel, if you’re reading this, and you’re obviously not since you’re probably pretty busy with damage control at the moment, I have a suggestion. Given the unexpected success of the dipsomaniac gambit several years ago, this time try a variation. The Tourette’s defense works every time…